Goodbye Hilm

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Every since Hilma died, I am only comforted by the timeless words by Shakespeare in Julius Caesar ........Cowards die many times before their deaths, the valiant never taste of death but once."

Hilma was by far the most courageous and vibrant person I have ever had the honour of knowing and calling a friend.

She passed on the 28th October after many serious health problems but unlike most people who have been afflicted with far less serious illnesses than her, she never accepted that these could defeat her and she lived life to the fullest. In fact, I would go as far as to say that Hilma was courage personified.

I vividly recall about three years ago, receiving a call from her while driving up Mount Rosser. She told me the lump she had found was malignant. She must have detected the fear and horror in my silence for she cheerfully assured me that it was discovered early and would be removed without a problem and all would be well. Its embarrassing, but she was the calm one while I was panic stricken.

The worse was yet to come however, as when the various medical procedures started at the hospital, it was also discovered that she had lost 95% usage of her kidneys. To tell you the truth, even now I can’t come to terms with how calmly she dealt with that double whammy .

Shortly after, she went through a terrible spell in hospital and at one time it was really touch and go but the minute she was released, she calmly and cheerfully took everything in her stride.

She had to be dialyzed twice per week but she treated dialysis like how we would accept having to take our vitamins and most days after dialysis, she went straight to work, after a short rest.

Because of her job as a flight attendant, I usually never knew when she was in Jamaica until she called me, but I can recall that on three occasions when she called and I inquired when she had returned to the island, her off the cuff reply was that she had not gone abroad but had been in hospital and was now released. She just did not want to worry her friends when complications had arisen and would wait until she had recovered before telling us.

On the day she died, Wednesday October 28th, I took her to dialysis at UWI as her car was down. When I picked her up she said she was feeling a bit weak and observed that even if she had her car, she did not think she could have driven herself to the hospital. She was coughing persistently and I expressed concern that maybe her recent bout with pneumonia had not been completely over, but she dismissed my concern saying that after they removed the fluid from around her lungs, she would be ok and was planning to go to work in the afternoon.

That was Hilma, so I dismissed all thoughts that she might really have become even more gravely ill. It was with total horror and disbelief that I heard Elara say that afternoon while we were at the hospital, that Hilma had died.

I have never before seen anybody exercise such courage. She will always be a great inspiration to all who knew her.

It was not just for her courage that she was outstanding, but in so many other ways.

She was a very loyal friend and employee for if anyone dared to criticize Air Jamaica in her presence they would get a thorough tongue lashing. She was a classy dresser who loved life and she was the life of every party.

We have a regular get together on Friday evenings and it was never the same when Hilma was absent as she brought a special vibrancy to those sessions keeping us entertained with the latest jokes or interesting experiences she had in flight and even stories about the happy days of her youth in Brown's Town... and she had a fantastic memory for she could remember things that happened to her from an early age, when most of the rest of us could not even remember what happened last year!

She only normally missed these Friday lymes when she was on duty but the Friday before she died she called to say she couldn’t come as she was not feeling well. Maybe I should have picked up something from that, but regretfully, because of her positive spirit, I did not even contemplate the possibility that she was close to death.

Hilma's main focus in life was her children Marsha and Jerome. Her goal was to ensure that they had the best possible education to properly prepare them to take on the challenges of life.



Just over two years ago, I got a call from her telling me I had to go to Miami with her as Marsha was graduating and she needed someone who could help her make a lot of noise when Marsha was walking up to the podium. Now, had anyone else ever told me that they wanted my company because I was a, loudmouth I might have been offended, but that was the relationship we had, like sisters really.

Once Marsha had achieved her goal’s, Hilma turned her full attention to doing the same for Jerome. In fact, at times I wondered if she was also attending medical school with him, as she would call to tell me all about the latest medical procedures that he had learnt. When he did his rotation in genecology, she called excitedly one night to report that he had delivered 5 babies in one day.

There was no stopping Hilma as she was always planning for the future.

She loved to entertain and about a month ago she reminded me that I had to come to her house for Christmas dinner and the last time she came to our Friday lyme, that was just two weeks before her death, she was planning Jerome’s graduation party.


Yes the body has succumbed but Hilma will remain like a shining light for all who knew and loved her.

I grieve with Marsh and Jerome but one day the pain of her loss will gradually begin to diminish and be replaced by the happy memories.

They are lucky to have had such an exceptionally loving, courageous and vibrant mother and I want them to know that because she had such a positive impact on everyone who knew her, I am sure that I am not talking out of turn when I assure them that all her friends will always be here for them .

Walk Good Hilma. We love you and will never forget you.
After I delivered that tribute, another good friend Audley Nain sang a most appropriate and moving solo "She was beautiful" originally done by Roger Whittaker, then Jerome, her son and my godson, delivered a touching remembrance.
Air jamaica pilots and flight attendants had a guard of honour as the body was exiting the church and while it was all good, I know Hilma would have preferred to be a spectaor and we would have preferred that too!
Now I am off to another funeral, that of one of my favourite cousins Dougie Chong formerly of Lucky Star Bakery. He will be buried at 11 am.

This is not as good period for me.